What a FUN Saturday!!!

Yesterday, Tom and I went to Wisconsin, he went to help on a work site with his uncle, cousin and brother, and I went and spent the day with his grandma and aunt making cards! I had so much fun, this is the first time in our marriage I have been able to spend time w/them by myself, not at a family function I mean. I am posting pictures of the cards I made while there from some GREAT ideas from Aunt Mary! Anyways here are the cards  I made!

This first one says " Age is only a number, Mine is unlisted" and "Happy Birthday" on the inside.

All shiny and CLEAN! lol

Ok, so I have been cleaning and organizing my dining room on Friday and then today...It had basically become the storage room for...well anything :) lol...the table was shoved in the corner that rug was rolled up since we took it out of our living room, the table was piled full of stuff and there was stuff shoved under the table, and stuff shoved in every corner as storage lol, but now, look now we actually have a table to eat at lol :) I love it, it looks so nice right now...OH and i got some paint on the mistint clearance at walmart the other day, and hope to paint my bathroom soon, i hope it will look GREAT! :) I will, of course, post pictures, when I do lol...I STILL need to post pictures of all the cool stuff we did when my mom was here...my house is really looking like a home! I love it so much! anyways, here are some pictures of my hard work. I have pictures to put on the wall, and we got frames for them last night, but they are odd sizes so I have to special order some mats for them, but THEN we will have pictures on the wall lol :)

1 month, and a fabulous gift!

Well today it has been exactly 1 month since this last miscarriage...and this past week I was given a BEAUTIFUL gift that is a great memorial and memory of our babies...When I met my grandma in Iowa, she gave me a package and I opened it and found this

Mine doesn't have all those birthstones on the side of it, it has 2 birthstones, 1 for September, 1 for October, for the months our babies went to Heaven. It has a saying on the back that says "it was then that I carried you" It is beautiful and perfect, and I love it, and just wanted to share it with all of you( sorry i couldn't get an actual picture of mine, i had to find one online)

Love/Hate Relationship with going to church

Please just hear me out before you scroll to the bottom to the comment box...lol...I love going to church....I love the praise and worship, the message, all of it, but on the other hand, the same things make me annoyed...with myself basically...see the problem is we went to church this morning, and ever since my life changed 3 years ago after the first miscarriage, when I go to church, it takes everything I have to not completely lose it! Crying, bawling, weeping, call it what you will, but its what i fight, and don't do that great of a job...I always think i'm doing just fine, until I go to church, and this was this way even before I was pregnant this last time, so you can only imagine what it is like now! Anyways, so I think it is a combination of everyone around me having kids, or maybe the couple sitting right behind us with a brand new baby, or the woman 3 rows in front of us with an even newer baby, or the use of the word "family" repeatedly, the praise and worship, the message, or maybe the pastor even mentioning in his list of things that might be going on in your life, he says something related to not being able to get pregnant, but it all somehow leads back to the same subject in my life...and makes me start crying, and I try REALLY hard to not let it be more than tears in my eyes, but then they say its time to pray and, well then the tears that were being held back by my open eyes, are now streaming down my face...See the thing is, when i am at home, during the week, even if i'm singing praise songs while cleaning, or praying or whatever, i am occupied and try to stay busy, and just be strong, and honestly believe I am fine, but then when I go to church, I feel it all so much more, and realize maybe when I said i didn't have an ounce of anger in me, maybe I was wrong, maybe just a couple ounces :) lol...but nothing fixes it, nothing makes a child appear in my life that is my own, but isn't it funny how we always want what we don't have...Someone will say something about how their baby cries all the time and UGH i just can't ever get anything done around here, and have no me time...and I want to say, I would give anything to have a baby that cries all the time and to have no me time...I've had enough me time to last me awhile...but then that person is sitting on the other side thinking what i wouldn't give to be able to just go to a movie w/my husband, or to be able to clean my house with no distractions, to not have to wake up in the middle of the night, etc...perfect example right now...it is 4:45pm on Sunday...the tv is on, but on mute, i have no clue why, tom is on the couch on his computer, and i am in the chair on my computer, its completely quiet in here, except the tapping on my keyboard and listening to my dog sighing because he wants out of his cage(after being bad)...i'm sure that sounds fabulous to a lot of you, Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, and my home and my life more than words can express, and am very thankful for Tom and I's relationship...and the continued foundation we are building for our family that we will have one day...weather that be through adoption, or naturally...its just like the pastor said at church today, and I know there is a great song about it too, but is that God is going to finish what he started in me, and that God never said this road would be easy, but I know I am not walking alone. Some days are just harder than others, and those days I know God is holding me even closer and reassuring me of His plan for my life. 

Fun giveaway!

I found this on my blogging friend Tara's blog and had to pass it along to you all, it is pretty cool, let me know if you win...if you sign up of course :) 

Long Update

Well, it seems like I haven't blogged for quite awhile, been trying to get back to normal around here. So I will just recap the last while lol...this last weekend, we went to Iowa to visit my family and Tom helped my dad remove the radiators from their house since they are getting a new furnace and stuff, so we got there late Friday night, and my dad and brother were already hard at work on removing the boiler and Tom jumped right in to help them finish up, and they were all FILTHY, i mean serioiusly! Mom and Katy know what I am talking about, we should have totally taken a picture! lol anyways...Saturday Tom and dad got hard to work and I went to hang out with my bestest friend, Britt, and had the FANTASTIC surprise to see an extra vehicle in her driveway! :) her family was in town and Britt, her mom and I got to sit and chat for a few hours, and I wish we wouldn't have had things to do, because we had a great time! Then Saturday night, we had a blast! My mom, dad, grandma Riley, tom and I all went to Pella and picked up my grandma Joyce for the weekend. It was a surprise to her that Tom and I were there, she didn't know we were coming since we had just decided on Thursday night we were coming for the weekend, so that was fun! Then we had supper at Happy Joes and drove back to Osky and we all went and saw the movie Fireproof. WOW! FANTASTIC movie! PLEASE go see it!!!! I could go on and on about that movie, but I will move along...lol...Sunday we went to church, the church I grew up in, and have not been back to for quite awhile, and it was nice to see friends! Then went home where we all got together again and had a very yummy lunch my grandma Riley had made for all of us! :) That afternoon we had the great pleasure of getting to see Kelly and Britt again, this time Tom was able to come! :) spent some time with them and then took the long drive home, so that was last weekend...

Last Tuesday we got a puppy, only to realize this week, that I am allergic to her! so I am driving halfway to Iowa tomorrow to meet my grandma, and Zoey will be living with my grandma and her little Izzy, I am sure they will be best of friends! 

Well, I think thats the most of it, oh other than a funny story from Tuesday night...Tom said I should blog about it, and title it something like, "As two ships passing in the night" lol...you will understand why, very soon...lol :) Tom got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, well him getting out of bed woke me up and I decided I needed to go to the bathroom as well, but layed there for a few minutes debating if I needed to go THAT BAD that i wanted to "wake up" and walk down the hallway and freeze to death, cuz i dont know about you, but its been pretty chilly here lately, despite my warm pjs, i just can't wear socks to bed, drives me crazy, anyways after a couple minutes I decided ok fine! so i climb out of bed, and walk out the bedroom door, with my eyes closed of course, because I don't want ANY glimmer of light to actually "wake" me up...and my hand on the wall, so I don't fall into the stair railing or something...I get halfway down the hall, and BOOM! OUCH! Tom and I collided, and of course because I am short, my head hit his shoulder or so, and it hurt! lol...I said didn't you hear me?! he said no, i can't hear anything, my ears are bugging me LOL...come to find out, we were both walking down the hallway, with our eyes closed...see? it makes sense to someone else...don't tell me you have never done that lol :) 

Anyways, I promise I will try to blog more often...if you all haven't given up on me yet lol...Like i have said before though, I really don't think you want to read my daily blog if all I write about is cleaning and organizing my house and doing laundry! I have had a lot of stuff weighing heavy on my heart that I want to blog about my thoughts and opinions, but at the same time, I think it will only create drama, not deter from it, and I hate drama...and its the LAST thing I need right now...so we'll see... :)

Thank you, I love my great friends!

How cute is this award? And its my first award...two friends gave it to me at the same time, first being my bestest friend Britt and another great, long time friend Anna. Along with this award comes a questionaire so here we go!  :)

1. Do you have the same friends since childhood? I have a few of the same friends since childhood, a couple actually since preschool and kindergarten! But my friends from when I was in jr. high and high school (even though I was homeschooled) I am still friends with most of them, and at least keep in contact with the rest of them :)

2. What do you value most about your friends? Honesty, sense of humor, geniune love and caring, I tend to be drawn to simple, "what you see is what you get" kinda friends, DRAMA FREE! lol :) You know what i'm talking about! 

3. Are your friends your sounding boards? Oh yeah! Especially my husband who is my absolute best friend, but secondly my bestest friend who I love that we can be completely honest with eachother, having a girlfriend like that is PRICELESS! :)

4. What is your favorite activity to share with your friends? I love to just hang out with my friends, watch movies, just talk, drive around just us girls and be goofy, but most of all, I LOVE to just talk to my friends, just being in contact w/them, even if its only through email or IM...i'm weird, i know :)

Thanks ladies! this was fun! now for the hard part, because all my closest friends have already been tagged with this award, but I have to pass it on to 4 friends...so I am going to award this to my blogging friends:

1. Melissa at Stretch Marks

2. Tara at Living A Dream

3. Jessica at Furse World

4. Brooke at My Broken Road

make sure you stop by their blogs and check them out, great ladies!!